Things I Love

30 things about ME

2011-03-06T13:30:00.000+11:00

Here are my 30 things ...

1. I am the youngest of five children, and the only girl

2. Somehow, despite this, I have managed a good balance of girly girl/tomboy

3. I am married to D, a wonderful, caring, funny, smart man

4. I am very clucky and my heart swells when I see families with children

5. I'd love a tattoo but not just for the sake of it. It would have to mean something and not be in public view!

6. I love cooking which means D and I rarely eat the same dinner more than once or twice.

7. This is about my fifth attempt at losing weight, and the only time I have combined WW with serious exercise and counselling sessions. Three pronged approach is working this time! :-)

8. I love the idea of being a blogger but find it really hard to commit to writing regularly.

9. I have quite a good job, and really love what I do.

10. I'm scared that my career will hit the skids when/if we have children. How do working mums cope?

11. I love our cat Fozzie and it really upsets me that he loves D more than me!

12. My mum had battled breast cancer three times, and I have accepted that the disease will get me too at some point.

13. I love watching the way my body is changing with weight loss and muscle gain.

14. Cleaning is my pet hate. And I am bad at it too.

15. We get our fruit/veg/meat/deli food delivered by Aussie Farmers Direct. Saves time and temptation at the supermarket.

16. I do not make friends easily. I have four amazing girlfriends that help keep me sane

17. I love magazines and have about 5-6 that I buy every month.

18. I have a girl crush on Nigella Lawson and Gwyneth Paltrow. Go figure.

19. I get really frustrated with my brothers for stressing my parents. Surely they are too old to be worried about their children!

20. Love, love, love cooking shows. British Masterchef, River Cottage, anything Nigella ...

21. I don't really have a sweet tooth ... I crave cheese, crackers, wine

22. Love Actually is one of my fave movies

23. Country Music is my secret shame ...

24. I sponsor a Brazilian girl through world vision, and I look at her photo everyday (it's at my desk)

25. I love nothing better than sitting in the sun with a glass of bubbly.

26. I am really proud of my hubby for joining my gym without prompting!

27. I really, really, really want an iPad. Can't justify it though.

28. I have a short attention span. This never used to be the case, but now I get bored really easily.

29. I am a cancerian. My motto ... "I feel ... "

30. I am a passionate Hawks fan (AFL) and try and go to as many games as I can!

Dry January

2011-01-09T21:21:00.001+11:00

I joined Twitter last July. As you do, I started following some random people, and a common hash tag was #dryjuly. Turns out, a whole bunch of people were having a month of no booze to raise funds for adult cancer patients.

So, I started thinking, how hard could it be? A month, 31 days, with no alcohol. Really, it should be a breeze.

In December last year I made the commitment (to myself) that I would have dry January. Not a fundraiser, more of a kickstart 2011 type scenario. Improve health, etc.

The first few days were a cinch. I'd drunk so much wine while away with D at the in-laws, that the thought of wine literally made me feel ill.

The last few have been more difficult. Yesterday and today especially, I could kill for a lovely, refreshing, crisp glass of Sav Blanc. I even have some in the fridge.

But no. I made this commitment, and I will stick to it.

Although, D and I are having a romantic, (read: lazy), weekend away at the very end of the month, so my January might have to end on the 27th.

But I reckon 27 days is close enough ...

Happy Holidays

2011-01-04T08:55:00.000+11:00

Ahhhhhh. Tuesday 4th January. Many people are heading back to work today. Not me! I have four more glorious annual leave days up my sleeve, and damn it I am going to enjoy them!

I don't really have very much planned. Catch up with a girlfriend and her 6 month old baby. Dentist. Hairdresser. Cooking. Cleaning.

It's just nice to have the luxury of time. No need to rush. No stressing about anything.

Right now, I'm going back to bed with the trashy romance I am currently reading. Ha!

Lazy Days

2011-01-02T11:30:00.001+11:00

I woke up quite early today. Thought, I should go to the gym. Then, rolled over and went back to sleep (after an argument with D). Woke up, ate too much for breakfast then went back to sleep! Eek.

Anyway, I've been procrastinating changing my blog layout (you like?) and now I have my gym clothes on, I am actually one step closer to going! Can't not go now that I am half dressed.

After gym, not much planned for the rest of the day. Washing, cleaning the house, finish packing away Christmas decorations, etc.

But now, I'm going to the gym. See ya.

NYE

2010-12-31T22:42:00.002+11:00

It is NYE and I am sitting on the couch with D-man, watching dodgy British comedy and drinking icy cold water !

We decided several weeks ago that we wanted to be at home on NYE, and despite a few offers we did just that.

It is a strange feeling though. It is the end of 2010, the beginning of 2011, who know what the new year will bring.

Health-wise, I am hoping for consistency with diet and improved fitness. For the first time EVER I have maintained an exercise "program", and I really do feel that the next stage is for the food stuff to kick in ... And when that happens, I'll be well on my way!

2011 will be a full on year work-wise, but exciting and challenging as well.

The new year will also bring more baby-talk with the D-man and I. No promises for anything more than talking though :-)

Anyway, time to go. Air-conditioned bedroom is calling.

Happy New Year. Be safe and happy.

Bec xx

The countdown is on ...

2010-12-29T16:02:00.005+11:00

About 6 weeks ago I made a decision to embark on Dry-January. Yes, a whole month without drinking alcohol.

I figured it was a great way to start off the year, and given that I won't see my personal trainer until 17/01, I am going to need all the help I can get.

I like alcohol. I probably, at times, drink too much (like the past three days, but that's another post!).

It is going to be a long month. And a tough month to be designated driver as January is a crazy month birthday-wise. In order here are the birthday celebrations for Jan: brother #3, cousin, niece, friend, friend, uncle, brother #4, dad, niece. Yep, that's 9 ... crazy times.

So, I am quite pumped up about January. Bit nervous. But I know I can do it.

Anyway, I'd like to reflect by posting some photo's of myself, drink in hand. There seem to be quite a few. Some good. Some bad, very bad.

2010-12-20T20:25:00.002+11:00

Frustrated. Proud. Scared. Angry. Tense. Amazed. Annoyed. Desperate. Edgy. Teary. Grateful.

I am on the emotional roller coaster today. Up, down, sideways. So much going on.

Frustrated: I have given myself an excuse to eat poorly, blaming lack of time and stress. Wrong! How much time does it take to cook a salmon fillet and toss a salad ... less time than drive through that's for sure.

Proud: I cooked Christmas dinner for 8. AND it was dairy free, gluten free, soy free, fructose free. It was awesome. I rock.

Scared: Scared because I am still very far from my short term weight loss goal. I am getting older, and babies are still not on the agenda. I need to lose weight and gain health.

Angry: With myself for letting excuses get the better of me.

Grateful: For my hubby. Today he just knew what would make me feel better. Thanks darling.

Tense: Physically. I need a massage. Now.

Amazed: At my ability to plan and cook a beautiful dinner. I am really, seriously amazed that I did not have a break down, or get super snappy or grumpy.

Annoyed: Annoyed, that it takes a weight gain for me to write down my feelings, and really express what is going on in my mind.

Desperate: Clucky. Yearning. Need I say more.

Edgy: Waiting for the holiday break. I finish work on 24/12 and don't go back until 10/01. Yeehaa

Teary: You know sometimes you feel like all the problems in the world would be fixed if you could just have a really really big cry. I feel like that now. The tears won't come though. Not yet.

So now I am off to bed. Hubby gave me an early Christmas present, Ahn Do's autobiography "The Happiest Refugee". I have heard Ahn speak at a conference several years ago, and have heard amazing things about his book. I imagine his story will put my struggles into perspective.

Grown Up

2010-12-16T14:53:00.003+11:00

I am currently feeling very grown up. I have Private Health Insurance. I figured it was about time. I am 30, eek, and if I get the insurance before I turn 31 then I don't have to pay the lifetime health premium. And, eventually we'll start a family, and I'll need insurance as I refuse to step foot inside Sunshine Hospital. Snob, I know.
So, this week I am off to the dentist and chiro. I am going to get as much benefit from this expensive insurance as I can.

Sunday Roast

2010-10-31T18:07:00.002+11:00

I love Sunday's.

I love that we can sleep in, even just a bit, and chat and plan our day while doing so.
I love that we can enjoy breakfast together, without rushing out the door into traffic and onto public transport.
I even love the bumming around at home, cleaning, cooking and doing very domestic type things.

Today's Sunday has included a sleep in, Pancake Parlour (naughty) breakfast, visiting my family (and my newly-wed brother), a nanna nap, grocery shopping and now, I can hear the Sunday roast sizzling away in the oven.

I love Sunday's.

Quickie

2010-10-04T19:13:00.002+11:00

... quick post, that is.

It's Monday night, I'm home from gym where I weighed in 2.4 kg's less than I did last week.
Yay me.

Having a quick and yum dinner of steak, with salsa, grilled asparagus and baked potato.

Will then settle on the couch with my man, and my mother-in-law (another post) and have an easy, relaxing night.

Will post a proper update tomorrow.

Bec

Feeling Motivated

2010-09-30T12:03:00.002+10:00

For about the last 10 years I have been on and off the weight loss/healthy eating/exercise bandwagon many, many times. More times that I care to remember.

I have had some quite good success doing weight watchers, but have always gained the weight back, plus interest!

I posted at the start of this year about addressing my personal issues that are impacting on me living a healthy life. I am pleased to report that since then, the last 4 months in particular, I have been seeing a psychologist with some good success.

I have been able to change some pretty nasty habits (mostly) and implement new strategies and actions to improve my health.

There is still a fair way to go, and not every day is good, but lately I feel that even if I fall off the wagon it is not the end of the work, as long as I get back on!

Anyway, best get back to work :-)

Sunny Sundays

2010-09-26T13:20:00.002+10:00

Today is a cracker of a day. Funnily enough, yesterday was also a cracker, but for different reasons.

It's Grand Final weekend in Melbourne.

It's Sunday, it's a sunny 20 degrees (heat wave?), the sky is blue and I have NO PLANS. What's that you say, a Sunday with nothing to do ... well, not quite!

D is out at a nerdy card fair, and I have cleaned the house, done multiple loads of washing (and hung them out, OUTSIDE I might add), and I am about to go to the gym.

When I get home, I will cook tonight's dinner - Poached chicken and soba noodle salad - and prepare parts of our weeknight dinners, so that we don't end up eating at 10pm!

I love days like today. No where to rush to, no time scheduled, just getting stuff done in my own time. They don't appear very often, and when they do I jump on them.

I hope everyone is enjoying their Grand Final weekend.

Shall we do it again next week?

My Family

2010-09-22T21:38:00.007+10:00

I know, I know, second post for the day. But I have just gotten back from a dinner with family, and despite our foibles (and there are many), I love them so much.

My family consists of D (hubby), plus 4 brothers, two parents, three sister-in-laws, five nieces and nephews, six additional nieces and nephew in-laws, and numerous pets!

We have our disagreements, but mostly we have laughs.

There are times when I wonder if indeed I am related to them, but on nights like tonight I am reminded of why I love them. No doubt, in later posts, I will whinge and moan about them!

And here we are. Last year at mum's 60th.

l-r

Rhonda, Bradley, Dad (Michael), Darren, Danika, Jason, me, Janelle, Mum (Jen), Gavin and Darren

Make-overs

2010-09-22T14:13:00.002+10:00

If you know me, you'll know that despite having four older brothers I am very much a girly girl. So it goes without saying that I love make-overs, make-up, jewellery, handbags and all things pretty.

Nothing puts a smile on my face like a purchase of new fabulous cosmetics and I have a collection worth many, many dollars.

So, I've decided that a blog make-over is in order. Hopefully these new fresh colours will inspire me to blog again.

Love,

Bec
xx

Big Step

2010-02-03T22:14:00.002+11:00

Yes, as the title says I have made a big step.
I have realised that my emotional eating is taking over, and overriding my hard work in other areas.
I now have a referral from my GP and an appointment with a psych for 18/02.
I'm scared shitless. What if they find out I'm actually mental?

How many have you done?

2009-11-29T09:44:00.003+11:00

You bold the things you have done. It's pretty easy.

1. Started your own blog.
2. Slept under the stars.
3. Played in a band.
4. Visited The Great Barrier Reef.
5. Stood under the stars in the outback, the real outback – think Uluru.
6. Given more than you can afford to charity.
7. Been to the Gold Coast’s theme parks – anyone, you take your pick.
8. Climbed a mountain.
9. Held a praying mantis.
10. Sung a solo.
11. Bungee jumped, jumped out of plane, been paragliding or hang-gliding, hot air ballooning – you get the idea, you’ve been hundreds of metres about earth in a seemingly flimsy contraption.
12. Visited Melbourne.
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea.
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch.
15. Had a child. Raised a child. Worked with children.
16. Had food poisoning.
17. Been to the Snowy Mountains.
18. Grown your own vegetables.
19. Visited the Brett Whitely studio in Surry Hills, Sydney.
20. Slept on an overnight train or bus.
21. Had a pillow fight.
22. Been backpacking.
23. Taken a mental health day.
24. Been buried in sand with just your head and toes sticking out.
25. Held a possum, kangaroo or koala – or any other native Australian animal.
26. Gone skinny dipping.
27. Been in a fun run.
28. Been on the Blue Mountain cableway.
29. Seen a total eclipse.
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset.
31. Played, or watched, summer cricket.
32. Sailed, kayaked or canoed our beautiful waterways.
33. Seen the Daintree.
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors.
35. Visited an Aboriginal settlement or mission.
36. Learned a new language.
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied.
38. Toured the Sydney Opera House.
39. Tried rock climbing (indoor or outdoor), abseiling or just simple bush walking.
40. Visit Queensland’s Gallery of Modern Art.
41. Been to the Tamworth Country Music Festival.
42. Sunbaked at Bondi.
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant.
44. Visited Broome.
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight.
46. Been transported in an ambulance.
47. Had your portrait painted.
48. Gone fishing.
49. Seen Tasmania’s old growth forests.
50. Been to the top of Q1, on the Gold Coast.
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkelling.
52. Kissed in the rain.
53. Played in the mud.
54. Gone to a drive-in theatre.
55. Been in a movie.
56. Driven the Great Ocean Road.
57. Started a business0
.58. Taken a martial arts class.
59. Visited Norfolk Island.
60. Served at a soup kitchen.
61. Sold Girl Guide biscuits.
62. Gone whale watching.
63. Got flowers for no reason.
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma.
65. Gone jet boating.
66. Visited Port Arthur.
67. Bounced a cheque.
68. Flown in a helicopter.
69. Saved a favourite childhood toy.
70. Visited the Australian War Memorial.
71. Eaten Caviar.
72. Pieced a quilt.
73. Stood in Federation Square.
74. Been on the Murray River.
75. Been fired from a job.
76. Travelled, or climbed, over the Sydney Harbour Bridge.
77. Broken a bone.
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle.
79. Seen the Three Sisters at Echo Point, Katoomba.
80. Published a book.
81. Visited St Mary’s Cathedral, in Sydney.
82. Bought a brand new car.
83. Been to Hermannsburg.
84. Had your picture in the newspaper.
85. Read the entire Bible.
86. Visited Parliament House.
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating.
88. Had chickenpox.
89. Saved someone’s life.
90. Sat on a jury.
91. Met someone famous.
92. Joined a book club.
93. Lost a loved one.
94. Saved a pet.
95. Been to the site of the Eureka Stockade.
96. Swum in The Whitsundays.
97. Been involved in a lawsuit.
98. Owned a mobile phone
99. Been stung by a bee.
100. Read an entire book in one day.

Broken ...

2009-11-12T07:30:00.001+11:00

Damn it. Last night, I attempted to blog. Blogger was BROKEN. I could not save, post, even copy or paste. So, I have failed the challege ... damn.

Damn Review

2009-11-10T18:15:00.003+11:00

Joy, oh joy.

This Friday, 13th November, I am lucky enough to be having my first "review" as site manager.

Now usually, I complete the review documents, which involves many silly ways to rank yourself, and hand it in without a second though.

But for some reason, today, I am in PANIC mode. The paperwork is due tomorrow.

I am probably in PANIC mode because my manager, lets call him MR. GRUMPY, is very reluctant to give any positive feedback, and I feel as though I don't know where I stand with him. I just can't "read" him, dammit.

So, I get to put my heart and soul into this review document, and will probably be none the wiser come Friday at around 3pm.

So, wish me luck. Fingers and toes and arms and legs crossed for Friday.
And here's hoping for a payrise ...

Poor Hubby

2009-11-09T21:27:00.002+11:00

Poor hubby is going away for work tomorrow. To Adelaide. Where it is going to be 39 degrees all week. Melbourne will be cool in comparison. I'll miss you darling.

If it's this hot in November ...

2009-11-08T21:48:00.003+11:00

I know it's way to early to be complaining about the heat, but what the heck.
DAMN it's HOT!
There ... done.

Seriously though, hubby and I live in a double story shoe box with NO AIR CON, and one warm day is ok but a few in a row makes our place a sauna.

On the upside, we have decided that early in 2010 we will move to a new rental, and on our list of must have's is heating and cooling. Also on our list is gas stove (currently have electric, and it's crap) and space space space.

I've just checked the weather forecast for this week, and there is no respite.
Monday: 34
Tuesday: 32
Wednesday: 37
Thursday: 29
Friday: 31
Saturday: 35
Sunday: 34

Oh boy.

24 sleeps and counting

2009-11-07T08:59:00.002+11:00

I really, desperately need a holiday. Seriously.

On 1st July I started a new job. I am now in charge of my own site, a brand new site at that!Which means the buck stops with me. Which I love, mostly. I have 9 staff that are direct reports and am in charge of a huge budget. Eek.

Since I started I have been working crazy hours, which is fine. I am just so tired.

So, we are going on a relaxing holiday! We set off for Thailand on 2nd December for 9 glorious days. We will do some token cultural/adventure stuff, but mostly we will be relaxing. We will also be away for our second wedding anniversary. :-)

Here is where we are staying: http://www.phuket.com/moevenpick/plunge-pool-villa.htm

I CANNOT WAIT.

Juno

2009-11-06T21:08:00.001+11:00

I know I'm a bit late, but I have finally seen Juno.

Wow, what a movie. LOVED it. In fact, I want to watch it again.

Maybe tomorrow ...

Dinner

2009-11-05T19:29:00.002+11:00

I am not a very good cook. I LOVE cooking, and cook books, and I can cook some things (ie risotto) very well. (If I do say so myself). But generally, I am pretty average in the kitchen.

I have a big problem cooking potatoes just right. I am getting better at making no-lumps mashed potatoes, but tonight I have used a ghastly packet type mix to make a potato bake.

So it's in the oven, and has been there for the required time - 45 mins. The potatoes are still raw. AND to make it worse, my chicken schnitzel is ready, and is going to be as dry as the desert before the 'taters are cooked.

Anyway, thats my potato rant for today. Exciting huh?!?

Motivation

2009-11-04T21:14:00.002+11:00

I have been somewhat lacking in motivation of late. My eating has been poor, and exercise even poorer. When this happens, the guilt sets in, and I eat.
It's an ongoing cycle, that I struggle to stop. I wish I knew how to make it (life) easier.

Lately, hubby has been trying to support and encourage me to go to the gym. That usually goes like this:

Hubby: Are you going to the gym tonight?
Bec: No
H: Why not?
B: Tired/Headache/Some other random excuse
H: I really think you should go

In turn, I get angry, frustrated and start feeling guilty.
In my head, I know I should go, and that I'll feel good (really good) when I go, but SOMETHING stops me going.

Tonight, we had this same conversation. But this time I got really angry, and shouted quite a lot about feeling additional pressure and not needing any additional (external) pressure. Then the tears flowed. The good thing is, I have spoken to lovely hubby and explained the kind of support I need and will respond well to. He understands.

So I went to the gym. It was crazy busy, and I got half of my program done before I gave up and went upstairs and did heaps of cardio instead.

And so, now, it's 9.21 pm. Dinner has been had, and Anne (mother in law) is washing the dishes. (A story for another time). There is a load of washing on, and I'm about to get into the shower in preparation for an early night. I will sleep well tonight, because my body is tired and needs the rest. What a nice thought.

Cup Day

2009-11-03T23:08:00.001+11:00

Melbourne Cup Day really is a non-event in our house. That is because we live in a shoe-box, and it is impossible to have people over, totally impossible.

So, hubby and I watched a few races, and headed over to my parents place for an early evening BBQ, which turned into quite a few drinks on my part ... oops.

I did have fun, hubby had a bit less fun than me, but hey, tomorrow is a new day.

Challenge?

2009-11-02T10:07:00.003+11:00

http://www.nablopomo.com/

Del has blogged about National Blog Posting Month. A month where the challenge is to blog daily. I like the sound of it, and I do really like blogging ... it will be good to get back into the swing of it.
So, I'm in.

Fun, fun, fun.

This is what the cat does when I have a sick day ...

2009-10-06T13:57:00.002+11:00

UP

2009-10-06T11:07:00.003+11:00

Sunday afternoon Hubby and I ventured out to see a movie. My choice. This in itself is unusual, because hubby often has a list as long as his arm of movies he wants to see. But this time, I really wanted to see UP.

Yes, it's a kids movie, but I really didn't want to wait until we are parents to see it!

I won't go into too much details but I highly recommend you see it.

I laughed, and cried. It is a very sweet film.

Fitness Goals

2009-10-05T11:44:00.000+11:00

Some of you will know that I have been going to the gym and have a weekly personal training session. I have sacrificed my pretty fingernails for this privilege.

So at my first session - 3 weeks ago - my trainer (Helen) suggested we set some fitness related goals. Now, I can safely say, I have NEVER had fitness goals. EVER. In fact, I was completely stumped at her question!

So, Helen made some up. and I didn't even really pay attention.

So today, when she said 'On the floor and give me 10', I did as I was told and was met with a very happy face. You see, apparently one of my fitness goals was to do 10 PUSHUPS in a row without collapsing. AND I DID IT.

Go me.

Sunday Morning

2009-10-04T10:58:00.005+11:00

This is how the conversation went:

Hubby: "So, do you still want to go our for brunch?"

Me: 'Yes, that would be good. Yum cha?"

H: "Do you have your heart set on yum cha?"

M: "Yes, I've kinda been craving it for a few weeks."

H: "Ok, you should make a booking so we don't have to wait out the front?"

M: "OK".

So ... booking made, and post shower, 30 mins later:

H: "I really don't want to go to yum cha, do you mind?"

M: "Well, yes I mind, I said I really feel like it."

H: "I just don't think I can handle the 'craziness' of yum cha today."

This is an example of many Sunday mornings, and other days in the Matthews household. Starts with wonderful intentions, but for reasons - usually relating to hubby's illness - we often have a last minute change of plans.

I wanted to share this, not only because I was incredibly frustrated on Sunday, but because hopefully it may shed some light on our unique situation.

I love my hubby dearly.

Awareness

2009-09-27T07:36:00.002+10:00

For me, awareness is probably something I lack in my personal life. I should say, I lack awareness about MYSELF.

I have had a mostly OK week. Work was OK (except I made someone cry, but that is a story for another post), hubby was OK (had a couple of days off work, the first in ages), I ate pretty well, and I did one walk, one gym session and one volleyball game.

I had my second personal training session yesterday, and while I will not say it is fun, I am being challenged, and it is really nice having someone looking out for you.

So, yesterday, Grand Final day, we opted to have a quiet day at home. We did have another offer, but such a big part of hubby's illness is that he struggles in big crowds, so he made the call early yesterday to stay at home.

So ... we had hot dogs, chips, lollies, pizza, chocolate ... and I had way too much bubbly.

I was in bed super-early, hence being awake super-early on Sunday morning.

AND I am paying for all of the disgusting food and wine I consumed yesterday. I feel bloated, and heavy, and I am going now for a walk around Princess Park in an attempt to kick start my day.

If time permits I will go for another walk this afternoon, but we do have stuff to do today.

So, back to the name if this post awareness.

Last night, I felt FINE. Well I was telling myself I was fine, but I am so used to eating that amount of food that I guess I probably did feel OK. I'm glad I feel horrible this morning, because it really does show me that my OLD eating habits are disgusting and bad for me.

Anyway, enough from me. Brisk walk around the park is calling.

Happy Sunday.

It's Sunday ... again

2009-09-13T20:49:00.002+10:00

Geez, the weekends go quickly, don't they?

I have not been at work (in the office I mean) since Wednesday, and I am dreading tomorrow. I'm just so tired ...

There's my moaning over and done with.

Had a lovely day today. Lazy sleep in with hubby, walk around the River and Idol this evening. Minimal cleaning and there's stuff I really should have done around the house, but hey ... it will still be there tomorrow.

I had my gym program show on Saturday, and have booked in weekly personal training sessions with Helen. I really like her, and found her good to talk to. She suggested the weekly PT session to keep my motivation up and I agree that it's a really good idea.

Anyway, it's nearly bed-time. Must get some clothes washed for the week ... bugger, should have really done that today! ha

When things go right ...

2009-09-09T11:03:00.003+10:00

Just wanted to share my evening with hubby last night.

Everything seemed to be right: no snitching, no stress, no mother-in-law!

We had a nice dinner together, cleaned up together, went to bed at the same time. It was nice to not be annoyed for a change, and I started thinking about why we snitch and stress.

Obviously hubby's illness can be a source of stress for us, and work usually plays a part. Many times though it can be a simple misunderstanding that causes the angst or argument ... and then there is no going back! If I snap at hubby, often the emotions linger and things do not improve.

So, I am going to make an effort not to snap or snitch over little things. I guess, I will pick my battles ...

Anyway, enough posting at work ... don't want to be a bad example!

Return to Blog-Land

2009-09-06T21:38:00.003+10:00

Yes, an unimaginative title. No shouting about how this time will be different, about how I will lose weight this time. Nope, just me, and life, and general ramblings.

It's interesting how you can be inspired by someone you have little or no contact with.

Martine is a complete stranger, and I stumbled across her blog some time ago. She is an inspiration. She has issues that she tackles, but still somehow retains focus on herself and her goals.

Del is a friend of DM who I have not seen in some time, but I find her blog very well written, and honest.

No one reads this blog anymore, and I guess that takes some pressure off it being incredibly smart/witty/insightful ... just me and some random thoughts. It seems that writing (typing) these thoughts out helps. Or something.

So, I'm sitting here with the heat pack on my neck drinking licorice tea and thinking about the upcoming week.

I have three days in the office, and two in Anglesea for the next installment of the Management Development Program (MDP). There is going to be outdoorsy stuff, right up my alley (ha!), and possibly camping.

I am trying to broaden my mind and understand why this will be developing me ... really, I am trying to be positive but I am shitting myself that I will embarrass myself in front of senior managers and co-workers. Thank god there is no-one from my team going.

My team have settled down since the dismissal of a staff member six days into their employment. We all had a chat at the site meeting on Friday and I think they trust that we made the right decision. I think. Again, trying to remain positive and focused and reinforcing they are doing a good job etc etc

Well, it must be time to zap the heat pack again and top up my tea. Goodnight.

Lost ...

2009-04-04T11:02:00.005+11:00

... in the "no tracking wilderness". I have been so lazy and unmotivated, I deserve to have gained more than 0.3. I would like to use an excuse here (eg. busy at work, celebrating mum's birthday, comiserating mum's illness) ... but no point ... and none of it should make an impact on my eating.

I am starting off my week today by planning all of our meals - no excuses!

I have the next 5 nights cooking dinner at home which I am looking forward to.

We are going to Gippsland for part of the Easter break, but the food there will be healthy, generally. Just have to watch my wine intake ...

I will weigh in before we leave so it will be a short week.

Let's go!

Umm ... WTF

2009-03-13T07:48:00.003+11:00

Message from the weight watchers website this morning when I tracked my weight:

Please note: You're probably excited to be losing weight, but you're losing faster than is recommended. Although it's normal to lose over 1 kg in one week, if you lose more than an average of 1 kg per week over a four-week period, this could pose health risks, such as heart irregularities, anemia or loss of muscle mass. Please slow your weight loss; your doctor can help you do this if you're not sure how.

* Lost 1.1 kg's this week. Average 1.6 kg's lost per week since commencing 5 weeks ago.

Goals ...

2009-03-09T20:24:00.002+11:00

I have been thinking a lot about my goals ... it has been just over four weeks since I set them.

The first goal is to lose 10% of my body weight. I am halfway there, I've lost 5%.

The second goal is to be at 100kg's by my birthday which is 16 weeks away today. If I lose 600 grams each week I will get to this goal. I do think I'll get there, and when I do I will buy a fabulous outfit to wear for my birthday. :-)

When I get to 100 kg's, it will be 16.54 kg's lost ... this is the point where in the past I have gone off the rails.

So I'm thinking that before I get to this point I need to do something about my motivation levels, as in keeping them where they are now ... at a steady point.

I am starting to playing indoor beach volleyball next week, in a girls team, for FUN. So assuming my dodgy calf holds up, that will be regular exercise weekly.

Apart from that I'm not really sure what to do. I'm happy walking at this stage, but I know that eventually it won't be enough, and that I won't gain any tone from it. I have enjoyed the gym in the past, but need variety to ensure I don't get bored. Arghhhhhhhh.

Any idea anyone? (I realise no-one really reads this, I don't expect answers.) :-)

Lazy Long Weekend

2009-03-09T20:22:00.001+11:00

Well it's Monday and I am back to work tomorrow. We have done very little this weekend, and I feel much better than I did Friday. I have cooked low point meals, and even prepared some lunch stuff for later in the week. I finally went for a walk today, first time since Tuesday last week. I felt much better after it, as was going to try for a second walk this evening but think that might be overdoing it.

The good news is that this week is a short week, as is next week! Yay.

A loss is a loss ...

2009-03-06T08:19:00.002+11:00

... bugger, only lost 100 grams this week.

Admittedly I have had a very boozy night, a pizza night and have been sick, so perhaps overall not a bad result.

The good news is, apart from Sushi Tuesday with Nat, there won't be many opportunities to 'stray' this week.

I have planned our meals in my tracker, and will do the shopping on Sunday.

Here's to a good week!

Bec
xx

Hung Over ...

2009-02-28T11:24:00.004+11:00

Well it's my own fault! But I am feeling slightly seedy this morning after a colleagues farewell last night. It started with dinner and drinks, followed by karaoke, then more drinks and dancing at Crown. Overall, a great night with great company. The hang-over, and extra points will be worth it, and I have a whole week to make up for it!

Success through Cheating?

2009-02-27T11:18:00.003+11:00

Knowing that I was planning a big night out Friday night, I decided to change my weight in day to Friday (instead of Saturday). So ... I have lost another 1.2 kg's ... but cheated slightly! That gives me a grand total of 6.7 kg's in 3 weeks. I realise this will slow down, but I am very happy with the results so far.

OH.MY.GOD

2009-02-21T08:32:00.002+11:00

Today is another wight in day. And pleasingly, surprisingly, I lost another 1.8 kg's bringing my total to 5.5 LOST. Yeeeeeessssssssssssssssssssssss.

I guess I shouldn't be too surprised. Despite having too much to eat and drink last Saturday night I have been really good, and earned 10.5 exercise points to try and make up for it.

So, I am pleased - very pleased. I feel good!

Anyway, walking to the supermarket now, starting the week well.

Bec
xx

Happy Anniversary Mum and Dad

2009-02-21T08:29:00.004+11:00

WOW, Mum and Dad are celebrating their 40th (Ruby) wedding anniversary today, despite the foibles of their relationship. Or maybe because of them?!
I can't really comprehend 40 years. But I hope that Darren and I are still going strong in 2047 ...

Back to reality ...

2009-02-15T19:41:00.002+11:00

What a wonderful few days!

We had Tony and Kate's wedding yesterday and had a lovely afternoon with some UK pals today. It was great to be able to celebrate in the midst of to much tragedy.

I have eaten (and drunk) way too many points, and am about to go walking to re-gain some control! Feeling good though, better than this morning ... :-)

Anyway, that's all for now. xx

3.7 is a wonderful number ...

2009-02-14T07:31:00.003+11:00

YAY, first weigh in and I have lost 3.7 kg's. Yesssssssssssssss.
I have worked really hard this week, to be "normal" and to be smart about what I put in my mouth.

We caught up with some friends for dinner on Wednesday, and while I went over in my points, I more than made up for it, and finished the week with 4.5 points left.

Being "normal" in terms of my eating is a real goal for me. Hubby and I talk about it quite a lot ... normal people can have pizza on Friday night but they don't eat the whole pizza!! "Normal" people eat chocolate, but not the whole block. "Normal" people eat well and exercise well.

So that is another goal. To be a bit more "normal".

Weight Watchers

2009-02-08T21:54:00.005+11:00

I have joined Weight Watchers, again. I know it works. Darren and I tried Lite n Easy, and while it helped, it was going to send us broke! So I have gone back to the very familiar weight loss and healthy eating plan, and after two days I already feel good. I don't feel bloated and I don't feel hungry.

I realise that being 100% good 100% of the time is going to be difficult, but I owe it to myself, and my unborn children to do this, and DO IT RIGHT.

I have around 50 kgs to lose. Which is major.

First goal - 10% ... 105 kgs here I come.
Next goal - 100 kgs by my birthday (June 29)

After then I will reassess, see how I'm going. I did have a few other goals listed, but thought I'd remove some pressure. :-)

I'm back

2009-02-08T21:36:00.002+11:00

I am a terrible blogger! I start with good intentions but never really continue. I guess that is the story of my life. I start thngs, but don't finish.

Like weight loss, for example. I have started many (!) times, too many to count. I KNOW I can lose weight as I have done it before, but I get halfway and lose the plot. I think I get confident in myself, and think that I can revert to previous (bad eating) habits.

I think, and hope, that I have realised that this is not a 'journey' but a lifestyle change.

I am never going to be able to eat take-out three nights a week.
I am never going to be able to eat the WHOLE bag of chips.
I am never going to be able to eat two servings of dinner.

I'm OK with that.

I feel good, knowing that I have the power to change my own destiny.
I feel good, knowing that with simple changes I will start to look better and be healthier.
I feel good, not being scared to start again.

So here goes. I will blog regularly, and I will keep you posted on any progress.

Wedding Bells

2008-08-28T21:39:00.005+10:00

It's coming up to a very exciting time of the year, this year 2008.
We have three weddings in the next three months.

Gorgeous Melanie and Travis are getting married on November 28th.
My biggest brother Darren is marrying lovely Danika on November 1st.
Louise and Nate are tying the knot on December 13th.

It's going to be a busy few weeks.

My littlest big brother also recently got engaged to Janelle. EP pics following.

Little Brother Jason

Mum and Karen (I love this pic)

Jason and Darren

Darren and Danika

Mini-Break/Darren's Birthday

2008-08-28T21:21:00.007+10:00

We had planned a mini break to conincide with Darren's birthday. Spent three days in Apollo Bay, on the Great Ocean Road, South West Victoria. It was simply lovely. The view was magnificent, and the company was wonderful. It does however feel like a lifetime ago. Here are some pics.

Buddy

2008-05-25T21:05:00.003+10:00

I'd like you to all meet Buddy. He is my bear from the 'Build a Bear Workshop' from my darling husband. He signifies a change in bad habits, and was a surprise from Darren a few weeks ago

He is very cute. He wears a brown and orange check shirt, with demin overalls and tradie boots.

He even has a 'heart' and a birth certificate.

I love him. But not as much as I love Darren.

Horoscopes

2008-05-04T21:05:00.002+10:00

I just love reading horoscopes and tarot. I realise that it is mostly alot of rot, but every so often something interesting pops up. Like this:

Open up your hope chest, and peek inside, Rebecca. On Monday, the Universe sends you a nice gift as the New Moon takes place in your sector of hopes, wishes, and dreams. You have a desire that has been on hold for a long time, and now you may see it fulfilled. Get ready to make a new list of your most hoped-for expectations. You have changed a lot recently, and your ambitions and aims have changed right alongside you! On Thursday, the Moon enters Cancer and your sector of self, and your emotions will be on high alert. You are a Moonchild - the sensitive and emotional Moon is your ruling planet. You respond to your life experiences in a very emotional way, even if you are just looking at the beauty of the sunset at night. As the Moon opposes potent Pluto on Thursday, you may need to channel your overflowing emotions in a creative way. Consider writing down your thoughts and feelings in a journal or an online blog. It might be helpful to your self-understanding to read your jottings later on, once you are in a calmer frame of mind and your sometimes turbulent emotions have quieted down.

So ... from this I have found inspiration to blog. I also think it is telling me that it OK to be emotional but that I need an outlet.

So I am back. I will, again, attempt to blog more regularly. Because my star sign says I should ...

Families

2008-03-30T18:30:00.009+11:00

I love my family. I have always been really close to them (not all, admitedly) but it is really interesting how your definitions of family change as you get older.

My immediate family is now Darren. We are the Matthews'.

Obviously I still have my mum and dad and brothers, (and neices and nephews) but also have a mother and father in-law, and a brother in-law.

I also consider our friends to be a part of our extended family.

Here are some pictures of the newest and littlest parts of our family.

Zachary Bryant

Cooper Gamble

Amelia Bryant

Chase Bryant

What a glorious day!

2008-03-02T20:32:00.004+11:00

Given that it is now officially Autumn, and that Darren and I missed a BIG chunk of summer, we decided to have a day at the beach! And what a glorious day it was.

Lovely 28 degrees, and the beach at Dromana was lovely and clear and COLD.

I didn't even get sunburned ... well not much any way. I have slightly red ankles ... from where I stopped my sunscreen application. Oops.

Anyway, today made me wonder why the hell we don't go to the beach more often. Especially at Dromana it's not too busy and it is such a relaxing way to spend a Sunday.

Anyway, fingers crossed for more beach weekends before winter.

PS We DID take the camera, however the batteries were flat. :-( Photos next time.

What a star!

2008-02-28T17:50:00.003+11:00

My mum is just amazing.

You may know that she has been diagnosed with breast cancer. She found out that it was going to be bad news a couple of weeks before our wedding, and had the biopsy on 7th December, the day before our wedding.

She started chemotherapy today. I just went to see her, and you kow most people would be pissed off with the world, but not my mum. She had a big smile on her face and said 'I don't even feel sick yet'.

She is so strong and brave, what an inspiration.

I hate feeling sick!

2008-02-26T16:21:00.005+11:00

I hate feeling sick because I get grumpy and I KNOW I take it out on my husband. I feel like throwing up constantly. And I have just been to the Doctor and I am not pregnant, so don't even ask.

I do think that being pregnant and having babies wouldn't be a bad thing, but we do need to wait, at least another 12 months. Need to reduce the debt, have some savings, and make sure we are both well and healthy before thinking more about it. We need to be totally prepared!

Some days I am desperate to start our family, and on others I am happy to wait. Does everyone feel like this, or did feel like this, before having children?

I'm back ...

2008-02-24T17:53:00.009+11:00

I have returned to the land of blog. Last time I really didn't put my heart into it ... but I am using this as therapy ... before I go insane. (It may be too late, you can be the judge.)

So, about my life recently ...

I just got married to Darren. He has bipolar, which can make life tough. Mostly it is great, I love him so much.

We have just found out that my mum has breast cancer, and is due to start chemotherapy this week. Last night we had a shaving party, and Mum, Darren, brothers Gavin and Bradley, friends Andrew and Dean all shaved their heads. Jason, waxed (!) his chest as did Brad.

I have started working a new office, which is presenting significant challenges.

I have also just begun personal training sessions in a bid to become fit and healthy, so when the time comes, my body will be ready for babies. This is the first time that losing weight has been this important. All of a sudden, it's not about me ... interesting.

I have joined a bookclub, which starts officially this coming Thursday. I am already doing a bad job, because I only JUST purchased the first reading, 'Romulus, my father'. Oops.

There is also a new baby, but I won't blog about him until his parents have!

That's all from me for today. This will be a regular blog, a diary of sorts. As I said, I probably need real therapy but this will do for a start!